Monday, June 27, 2011

I love me MORE.

Life has been blissful lately :) I just finished my first summer course and just got off a 3 day weekend! Today I went back to work but I'm definitely looking forward to this weekend! I get to spend 4 days at the beach, YAYYY :D be happy for me ;) Well I hope you guys have been doing well. XO.

No, I refuse to let you come into my life once more and shake it up. I rather miss you from afar because for four months I was perfectly fine without you. Yes I thought about you and wanted to see you BUT I was fine, I was happy; I was going on with life. Now you pull one of your "let me appear for a couple of days and disappear for months" stunt; I refuse to play along with this. My feelings are always the ones that end up getting hurt and you might not care about them but I DO! Once and for all someone has got to put a stop to this never ending cycle. I love you, but I love me more.

xSigned___JNF. ♥

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Old memories.

Hello dolls! I know I know, I've been gone for too long! *Waves hand in air and sips coffee*

Anyways yea yea blah blah many things have been happening in my life curretnly, you guys know the drill. Let's get to the good stuff :D
Two things happened today 1. An array of thoughts seeped into my head and 2. I watched the last episode of season 5 of Keeping up with the Kardashians. (These things go hand in hand!) Today a person seeped into my head and an array of memories along with this person did also. My ex boyfriend's mother seeped into my head. This woman was so wonderful to me. I owe her so much and I wish I had the time to repay her for all she has done for me. I feel like that's a hard part of breaking off a relationship. It's hard to also leave behind the people who were so wonderful to you and had nothing to do with your failing relationship. You invested so much time and emotion into them. Atleast I know I did. Whether or not they would like you. Whether or not you would get along. Whether or not they would accept you. And when finally all of the above is grounded you've got to move on and leave them behind. How do you explain to them that there are boundaries all of a sudden. How do you explain to them that you can no longer pop up at their house and visit. Or call them or text them? How do you explain this? Why do they have to pay for YOUR failing relationship? I've been wondering this for 2 years. Today while watching the last episode of KUWTK, Kim and Khloe got into a huge argument over Khloe having pictures of Kim's ex boyfriend around the house. Khole explained that she had invested so much emotion in Kim's ex boyfriends that it was hard to just move on the way Kim did and leave them behind. I totally agreed and saw myself in the same predicament. There have been times where I just wanted to drive over to my ex boyfriend's mother's house and spend a good afternoon in her company like I had always done but I refrained from it because times are different now. Things have changed. Though it seems unfair I guess it's part of the moving on process. XOXO loves!

xSigned___JNF. ♥