Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Homage to the good men.

Oh hey look I'm back...

The Jamie from 2010 would have never written what I'm about to write.
For the longest time I never understood the infatuation of certain women and wanting to always have a man by their side. I never understood why they needed to feel loved by a man 24/7. Now I get it.

I now understand this need that we as women have to find the perfect man, in our eyes of course. This year has proved to be long and hard and while I know I could have gotten through it without the special man in my life it was that much easier and rewarding with him.

Now hear me out don't go all feminist on me. I am not saying to go out there and the first man you see out in the street to go and snatch him up and ask him to help you get through stuff. However what I am telling you is to go out there and find the man that will love you unconditionally, the man that will cater to you, help you grow, set you in line when need be, give you advice, indulge in your flaws, journey with you, pray with you, celebrate with you, push you, feed you (in every aspect! I mean who doesn't love food right?!), and most importantly go through everyday life with you thanking God for a new day to make things right.

I am so blessed to have the special man I have in my life. He is literally what I have waited for my whole life. He is the man I plan to marry and have kids with, travel the world with and grow old with. He is my best friend, lover and soulmate all in one. I could never, in my whole entire life, thank God enough for placing him in my life 7 years ago. With every passing day he helps me grow into a better woman, the woman he needs. It gets hard at times because we are so different from each other but I wouldn't want it any other way.

It is so rewarding to be in a relationship where you are constantly growing together and I'm so proud to be in such relationship. To all the women that have fought to have their need to be with a good man understood, thank you. Thank you for helping me understand this need. Thank you for allowing me enough insight into what it could really be like to be in a relationship with a man that truly cares and loves you.

Again, thank you for listening.
I love you!
Jamie F.

Like a Phoenix..

Hi! (Nervously wave while trying to dust the cobwebs off my keyboard) I've been gone for far too long and for no good reason at all. There's never a good reason for me to be away from my first true love this long, ever. But like all things once I stray from my passions because of everyday life I always find my way back.

So here I am...

I would give you the super long story which is filled with sorrow, tears, stress, misfortune and yada yada but I rather not. So I'm going to give you the uplifting and liberating version of it.

This year has been long and tiring filled with all of the above yet it has been rewarding and life changing. It consisted of so much personal, spiritual and emotional growth that if i grow in those aspects anymore I swear I will burst into flames, simmer down into ashes and be born again just like a Phoenix.

That's how I feel. That's how this whole year has felt. Out of my misfortune I found growth and freedom. Out of my tears I found strength and joy. Out of my strife I found change. It has been a whirlwind of things but I couldn't have gotten through it without God and my amazing support system. Those are the two most important things in my life and after all I've been through I am so much more grateful for then existing in my life.

I used to take them for granted so much, always telling myself they would always be there. Which don't get me wrong they will but with that comes a sense of ungratefulness. I didn't want that for my life anymore and I felt I had to change before it was too late so I did. Life is so much more rewarding when you realize the true value of something.

So to the real lowdown to things...

I found a job! Yes I did after searching high and low.
No it's not a big time corporate job. Yes it is a job at a restaurant.
Wait before you go and judge me hear me out. It has been a rewarding opportunity. God never fails to amaze me. I have met some amazing people and some people that have tested my character to say the least. It's been an experience that I will very much share with my kids and grandkids. It's so amazing to learn new things and I never envisioned myself working at a restaurant, specially after college. However, here I am making the best of it day by day.

I have also put YouTube on hold. I just didn't want to be debby downer while filming. And plus I just wanted to be in a much better state of mind. Anyways I have a renewed sense of self and life and I feel much better about taking life as it comes, one day at a time.

I'm sorry for being gone for so long.
Thank you for listening.
I love you.
Jamie F.