I was in bed but too many memories seeped into my head and too many tears cluttered my vision so I decided to blog. I had been thinking about past loves and how fast time has gone by. It was like yesterday I remember getting into my first relationship. Oh how innocent I had been, how pure had that love been and how amazing had everything ended. No hard grudges, no heartbreak, no anger. Just two individuals moving on in life and realizing that better things awaited them. That they were to see better things. Of course I was melancholy, I was moving to a whole new state. I was going to a whole new high school. I was leaving my friends behind. My second relationship met me here. Again I had been pure, innocent, naive. Yet this time it was different. This time my heart broke. This time I cried toxic tears. This time I had met something new, deceit. I had met unfaithfulness. Yet years later he still tells me to forgive him and take him back. Yes I forgave him, but take him back?! Now maybe in another life and even then i would think about it. My last relationship met me here.. & It was the first time I had ever been in love. I didn't know what it was to love an imperfect person so perfectly in my life until my last relationship. My love for this man ran so deeply that it poisoned me in every way possible. It was deep. It was scary. It was in every way exactly what I wanted. I didn't know it was possible to love someone so much but my friends it's possible. Hopefully one day soon I get to love like this again. I have so much love to give but no one to give it too..